How do u spend your childhood n early teenage years? Mine?..Its hard to judge, theres a pros and cons of my upbringing. I never blame anyone, my parent, myself or society for it. For me its just nature following its course.
    I was born premature, 7 months in d womb, not because i can’t wait to get out but my mom have this complication concerning high blood pressure. It either me or her, that is going to die, but thank God we survived. Being the last child, premature, almost died during childbirth u will understand how my parents raise me up. It’s like the Malay proverb ‘bagai menatang  minyak yang penuh’  and thats what my dad always said. Both my sibling are grown up already so much of the attention is towards me. If u guys think I’m spoilt, up to you guys to judge me but i don’t act like one do I?
    As I grew up, i don’t socialize much with kids my age. I don’t know why. Maybe because my parents are a bit strict with who I mixed with. They never said it, but i know. I just know from the face of my parents that they don’t allow it. Still my parents do gave me the freedom of making decision, it’s just I don’t want to do so.Thus most of the time I spent at home, watching telly  ( hahaha very British ‘telly’). I found a new love..Books. I don’t have much books at home, a set of encyclopedia (made in the 60’s) that i enjoyed very much, my brother’s science book maybe some cookbook i guess. Of course the encyclopedia is in English and I don’t understand much that time. There are pictures u know so I knew that rotating magnet can create electricity. Slowly but surely I learn English from my dad. He’s not highly educated, just a soldier. Why if he have the chance he won’t joined the Air Force in the first place! We still speak a bit of English at home, especially when I wanted something that requires his permission. When I went to people’s home I looked at their books, sitting next to their book rack. Mum said one of the ways to make me shut up is to give me a book. I’m quite talkative as child, usually telling people bout the things i read from those books. I did that till this day didn’t I?
    During my early teenage years, I probably grew a bit of anti-social personality. It’s not that I hate people, it’s just I don’t know whats the word for it but I’m not used to it, OK? I don’t greet people that I do not know even if they are friends of my friends, and don’t expect me to make the first move either. People may think I’m ’sombong’ for doing so. Whatever..I just don’t feel comfortable. I prefer the word ’shy’ to describe it..hehe.
    So until this day, I only have a few collection of friends and I never go to their houses, except for one or two. Most of them do invite. But it’s just that I felt awkward. My behavior, some inappropriate ones, maybe attributed to way I grew up. I’m not used mixing with people so maybe I don’t know how to carry myself in public.
    Looking at the pros of it, I must say that it help me to concentrate on my education. At home, without friends what else you going to do right? I don’t read comic’s like most kids do when they grew up and internet is not like nowadays. I don’t smoke, I don’t do drugs, I don’t go out at late at night n ‘rempit’, I don’t sit around at shopping mall doing nothing. I guess it’s because theres no influence of it back then when the time where most people enjoyed themselves with their friends.
    It’s kinda sad really that I don’t actually enjoyed my childhood the way other people do and get to know people. But looking at the pros of it in this age where we see bad things around us, I’m thankful for it and it makes me they way I am now. Now I do have the freedom to hangout with everybody else, maybe I’m just too used to be alone that I feel comfortable this way.
    Thats all I can tell you about they way I grew up…